i am not responsible for other people’s reactions to my feelings.
I MUST have my own experience of things.
It is not wrong to express my own emotional experience.
What I am scared of is: what people do with what I share with them. I developed a belief very young that other people can make my experience untrue. Their judgment of the feelings or thoughts I have is all that is left…
Sorting myself out of that feeling is like playing in fire. The inside of my chest and head burn as I think about it, as I try to look at that reality of mine. I have never lived independently of that fear, independently of other people’s power over my feelings and actions. I have never lived fully responsible for my own feelings and experiences. I am a powerful woman but I wouldn’t know it.