I found this piece of paper that I had written a bunch of things down on. They all sound like explanations for how I could convince myself to stay away from G.
The notes look like this:
Getting worse-he never said The things he says now – well, maybe.
I can’t be here
I’m going to go, and when you get anger management, get counseling, I will be there.
I don’t want to be faced with my partner saying things that make me feel so scared and so out of place.
I want to talk to him when he’s not drinking. If he doesn’t come to me to talk sober, I’m going to plan to go. If he does not call and they can play with counselor, I’m going to go
I’m getting depressed.
I’m getting mixed messages.
I think that the best thing is for me to go. We can Live separately and you can see if you really want to be with me. I can’t live with the ups and downs.
If you don’t Think you you need to work on anything then you’re telling me that you choose to respond to me like you did the other night, and that you think it’s okay even though it’s not okay for me.
I don’t want you here anymore. I love you and I want every day, every week, and every month to be free of the downs you have.
When you do things disregard us, I should just say, “That upset me. “And why.
I am an easier around you. Afraid to share my feelings.
How you’ve always done stuff is not going to work anymore.
I know that you’re saying you feel I am just unhappy with you.
I can’t seem to work effectively wallet with you.
The weekend before last, When you called Mary Lou, you seemed like you wanted me to hear her saying that you need to be on your own.