Beautiful You – Day 5 Journal – consider my vision
What is my vision for myself?
To feel solid, to feel certain, to feel positive, to feel clear in thought, to feel focused on what I want, and what I’m doing. To be living a life that comes straight from inside of me, that is an indication of my most personal abilities and needs and likes and wants.
What do I wish or want for myself?
Security. Comfort. Both financially and in what I think and feel. To have people around me, and someone close to me, who know how to fulfill themselves and work together with me to make things better, always. A nice placeto live. A job that is a part of me, that is easy because it comes naturally to me. People who are close to me or not threatening. People who take care, like I want to take care.I want acknowledgment for that Waze I am delicate, fragile, phone Rible, as well as how I am strong as nails, not to mention my desire to be happy, the efforts I make for happiness.
How is that different from who I am or where I am today?
I am without a job, almost failed out of school, living off of savings and slowly running out, working up the credit debt. I have a nice place to live but I am renting it, and I can only afford it for so long, at this point. The people that of been closest to me, don’t value me, are dishonest with me, would prefer to maintain their drinking habit over our relationship. The people that are nice to me good to me, I have had at a distance, because I’m ashamed of my patterns, my isolation, my anxiety. ashamed of how badly I do at doing my work and making important decisions to move on into my future.
As for acknowledgment, I don’t even know how to acknowledge myself, for the work I do, the worry, the tenderness and desire for positivity and peace. The mean and scary voices often take over my mind.
What do I think would make me more confident?
Doing the smallest things, and documenting that I’ve completed them. Getting more help from the friends that have confidence in me. Keeping up my physical exercise.