Recovery can be deceivingly difficult…for us denial-ridden creatures.
I’ve been overwhelmed with all of the things I have on my plate lately, still thinking I am in control of the things that happen around me, and in control of my own behavior… I feel like a bit of a git, often.
But even in the everlasting mess, I have been able to begin to make decisions that free others from my control, and free myself from suffering others crap when I don’t have to, regardless of how counterintuitive both I those things are. I gave my ex the message that he can drink but he cannot bring his drunkeness into my day, my evening, my sleep time… That has been excrutiatingly difficult. Especially because it takes so many tries, over and over. Because alcoholics don’t hear those things, and don’t see or feel the effects they have on people. But I keep repeating…